Tips for a Smooth Transition and Emotional Well-being.
Preschool is an exciting time for children and parents. Every milestone with little ones is bittersweet, and nothing chokes you up quite as much as seeing your babies with their little backpacks and lunch boxes. Thankfully, preschool tends to only be twice a week, and for only two to three hours a day, depending on the program. It is not rigorous or as academically driven as an actual school. It is a time to learn how to go to school, how to listen to a teacher, and how to leave Mom and Dad at the door.
So how do we help this transition? Our children have only been left with friends, parents, or trusted babysitters. Being left with a teacher with many other children can feel foreign, and scary.
Here are some tips to prepare them for an easier transition on that first day of preschool.
Take them to Story Times.
If your local library does story times or play times for young children, take them to this. This is a wonderful example of preschool and how they will be expected to behave. Normally this requires sitting, listening, and small activities afterward. These times include other children, and they get to learn the boundaries with other kids. You as the parent of course stay with them at this time and can help guide them through the experience.
What if it doesn’t go well?
Keep trying. Having a toddler scream, cry, and throw a fit during a quiet story time is embarrassing and no one wants to do it. Remember that you aren’t a bad parent, and no one is judging you. Those librarians have seen it all— and they know this is a new skill for you and your children.
If your child is kicking, screaming, or having issues playing nicely with other children, remove them so they can try and calm down. Try again after the issue has de-escalated. And if they can’t seem to calm down, try again next week! Sometimes that day is just not the day. However, if story time is regular at your library, and you’re able to, keep going on a schedule. Even if you show up only for them to scream through the first ten minutes and you need to leave. Consistency and at least showing up will gradually help.
Talk to them about it.
It seems so simple, but it helps so much. Talk to them about preschool. Before they’re even signed up talk to them about it. About learning, listening, and following directions. About pottying, taking care of their snack trash, and helping pick up toys. All of the normal skills they use at home can be a way to insert the idea of preschool into their world. And when we use things they already do and understand, it helps them feel like preschool isn’t that different after all.
You can also insert certain shows to help with the idea of preschool as well. Daniel Tiger specifically does an excellent job of showcasing those first couple days of preschool, and can help your child understand what’s going to happen, and that it’s alright to be upset. Daniel Tiger uses songs and phrases that you can use to help them associate with the experience. Children are visual learners, so anything we can show them on the ways of preschool will be taken in with a much higher retention rate.
Show them the preschool before day one.
Many preschools have a meet-and-greet day for their kids. It’s an event for all the new kids in the class to come see their classroom, make new friends before the first day, and get a feel for their routine. Parents and children get to know the teachers and class helpers better and create a relationship where parents and teachers are working together. This is a great time to bring up any concerns you have for your child’s first day. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by how you think your child might react, this is also the perfect opportunity to ask their teacher about successful methods for the first day— or even the first week. Chances are, they’ve been doing this a while, and they’ll have a few tricks to help get you and the kids off to a great start on their first day.
Remember that it may not work.
The experience of your child being left in a new place is going to be hard for them. It’s going to be hard for you. Remember that this is a natural part of life. They’re learning independence. Those first few minutes when they need to give kisses and hugs before you go about your day will be hard, and there may not be anything that helps them except the experience. You are going to leave. Eventually, they are going to play, run, make pictures, read stories, and forget that you aren’t over their shoulder. Accept that there may be tears all around. But remember, it’s only for a couple of hours! Two to three hours is not that long, and you’ll be picking them up in no time. Gradually, as they make friends and learn that there are things at school they love— certain activities, certain toys, certain people— drop-off will get easier. And bittersweet it will be.